The great battle for perfect skin and how I eventually got there Part 1

Anybody who has ever been the victim of acne prone skin will know the havoc it wrecks on your self-esteem and the extreme lengths we go to in order to combat acne. My own battle started when I turned 14 in 1996. My skin changed from baby smooth into a battlefield of oiliness, cystic acne bumps, and blackheads galore. I was fully aware it's all part of being a teenager but somehow my skin was way worse than my fellow pubescent friends. Being a boy as well put me in the unfortunate situation of not being able to cover up my imperfections with concealer and foundation like all the ladies were doing in my high school. Though most of them never did a very good job at creating a foundation base-flashing those caked on pinky ash foundations with the tell-tale mask line around the jawline way too often. 

The added pressure of having a blood red face riddled with acne is probably the worst thing that can happen to any teenager trying to fit in. So of course I ran for the counter products. You name it I've tried. I had the mindset that the more a product burned the better it was. That burning sensation and sting I felt every time I lathered my face in benzoyl peroxide or alcohol laced products gave me the false sense that I was fighting a winning battle. How could a pimple win against something that burned like a mofo I thought? Of course soon after starting my skincare battle plan my skin became dry and flaky and the oil production tripled over night. I didn't understand. Why wasn't it working? Why are all the ads on television telling me to buy these products which didn't seem to work? 

I was beyond depressed. I couldn't look at myself in a mirror, I would switch off the bathroom light when I took a shower or bath to avoid looking at my face. I drank antibiotics and vitamin A supplements, I slept with mud masks on my face, I even covered my face with toothpaste before I went to bed. In my panic stricken state my parents intervened and made an appointment at a dermatologist for me. I was so relieved, finally an expert will tell me how to fix it all and give me a magic pill that will take it all away. or so I thought.

Like most dermatologist I've encountered in my 16 year battle with acne (yes it's been that long) the first one I went to assured me my eating habits had nothing to with my acne (big mistake I later discovered it has everything to do with what you put into your body) and secondly he prescribed a dose of the controversial Roaccutane drug. Now for anybody who has ever taken the drug you will know it comes with a plethora of side-effects including:

Not a lot of fun if you're a teenager but when you're desperate for clear skin you will endure all of these temporary side-effects. Whilst taking it I never experienced suicidal thoughts or depression I did suffer from very dry skin, chapped lips and dry, itchy eyes. My skin cleared up like magic however, it was like a scene from a sci-fi film. Watching the oil dry up and the pimples disappearing almost moved me to tears. The thought of never battling another pimple once I finished my cycle was a foreign and freeing concept and I couldn't wait for my new life with clean and clear skin. 

I finished my first cycle and I stopped taking Roaccuatane. Within a month of quitting it the acne and oil returned with a vengeance. Even worse than before-I was devastated . Why is this happening to me again? Am I being punished ? This awful setback was to the beginning of a decade of back and forth of taking Roaccutane. I lost count how many times I've taken the drug. But it would be somewhere in the 20's. Many people warned me about the dangers it posed to my liver but I couldn't be talked out of it, in that panicked state of mind I pondered who ever sees my liver? Nobody. Everybody sees my face and that was worth risking my health in the long run. Only now do I realize how immature and foolish my mind set was back then. I am by no means badmouthing Roaccutane, it is indeed a miracle worker for acne takien in the right amount under the supervision of a professional dermatologist. I was just one of the small percentages of people whose skin would bounce back to an acne state once you quit the drug. I decided it was time to look at alternatives to fixing my skin once and for all.

End of Part 1. Stay tuned for Part 2 where I share how I finally kiced Acne in the comedone.